Discretion is the better part of valor.
What is sacred nowadays? Remember when you would DIE if the world found out how much you liked the chunky goalie from the 4th grade class across the hall? (And maybe you did die inside a little bit when he found out and didn’t like you back? And maybe then he transferred schools and so you’ll never know what your love could have been or if he transferred schools to stay away from nine year-old you? Just me? Ok.)
Those days are obviously gone. Now people are thrilled to rehash the most personal details of their lives for the entertainment of the masses. I get it. (Obviously, I have a blog. And I tweet. And I will do anything for a laugh. Truly, anything.)
But trust me, no one wants to see a picture of your ingrown toenail on Facebook. And writing about your break-up in your very public blog is not going to make anyone come back to you. And Sinead O’Connor, for the love of God, step away from Twitter! The internet is forever. It may seem that documenting the moment is important now, but putting a little thought into your online dignity will save you a lot of explaining later.
And I’m off my soapbox.
To display the fact that I have no dignity online or in real, tangible life, last night, I forgot bobby pins to pull back my bangs at the gym. I used an extra ponytail holder and worked out for an hour looking like Pebbles Flinstone. I kept thinking dudes were checking me out, but I feel fairly certain that was mostly overt displays of judgeface.